Cappellanusí [Andrew the Chaplainís] 31 rules for courtly lovers
(developed c. 1185 at the court of Eleanor of Aquitaine and at the court of her
daughter, Marie [Cecily] de Champagne, where Chrťtien de Troyes was writing):
- The pretext of marriage is no proper excuse against
- No one who is not jealous can love.
- No one can have two loves at once.
- Love is always growing or diminishing.
- There is no savour in anything obtained by the lover
against the belovedís will.
- It is not customary for a man to love before puberty.
- It is right that the lover should remain unmarried for
two years after the death of the beloved.
- No one should be deprived of his love without very good
- No one can love unless driven on by the prospect of
- Love is always banished from the home of avarice.
- It is not right to love women one would be ashamed to
take to wife.
- A love divulged rarely lasts.
- The true lover desires no embraces from any other than
- An easy conquest makes love worthless; a difficult one
gives it value.
- Every lover grows pale at the sight of the beloved.
- At the sudden sight of the beloved, the loverís heart
- A new love drives out the old.
- Honesty alone makes a person worthy of love.
- If love grows less, its decline is swift and it seldom
- A man in love is always fearful.
- True jealousy always increases loveís ardour.
- A suspicion concerning the beloved increases jealousy
and loveís ardour.
- A man perturbed by thoughts of love sleeps and eats
- The belovedís every act ends in thoughts of the lover.
- The true lover esteems nothing good except what he
thinks will please the beloved.
- Love can deny nothing to love.
- The lover cannot be sated with the solace of the lover
- A slight presumption forces the lover to suspect the
worst of the beloved.
- He who is fired by too much lust is not likely to love.
- The true lover is at all times continually absorbed in
imagining the beloved.
- Nothing prevents a woman from being loved by two men or
a man from being loved by two women.
For more information, see The
art of courtly love
by Andreas Capellanus. With introd., translation, and notes by John Jay Parry
(NY: Ungar, 1941).